Meet your core needs

We’ve all got a mix of physical and emotional needs* at our core. Meeting them is the foundation of our wellbeing.

Check out this list of core needs. They’re not in order of priority, and they often overlap and interact.

Lives That Work coaching focuses on how you get your needs met to create a life that works.

*This section draws extensively from the Human Givens model of emotional needs and innate resources.



A sense of stability and safety, a secure place for growth and development, and an ability to judge risk.

Do you feel secure in the major areas of your life, eg, home, education, work, source of income, health, important relationships? 

Control, autonomy

Our power to choose and decide, knowing what we can control and what is beyond our control.

Overall, do you feel a sense of control over your life and the things that matter to you?


Our intake of physical fuel.

Do you get energy, nourishment and enjoyment from your eating and drinking? 

Attention exchange
(social nutrition)

Attention is an appetite that needs feeding. From day one, attention exchange is essential nutrition for us – as social beings and learners – with benefits (and risks) similar to other appetites.

Overall, do you feel that you get, and give, enough attention in your daily life?

Belonging: close connection

Our sense of belonging in our whānau, kin group and/or through other close or intimate connections.

Do you have trusted relationships with family members, partner, friends, pets – but at least one in which you feel completely accepted for who you are, flaws and all?

Belonging: community connection

Our sense of belonging in wider society.

Do you feel part of a community, eg, your neighbourhood or workplace, or organisations or groups where you can share activities or interests?


Self-respect for our capacity to accomplish things and/or make a contribution.

Do you have a sense of achievement and competence in at least one area of your life?

Standing, respect

Our sense of being valued by others.

Do you feel that your worth or contribution in some area of life is acknowledged and respected by others?


We are made to move and to learn.

Do you feel that you get your body/mind sufficiently moving and engaged? 


Essential downtime from conscious existence for rest, repair and maintenance of our body/mind.

Are you able to have restful and restorative sleep?


Time and space to and for ourselves.

Do you get enough time out, for example, to refresh yourself, focus on personal priorities, to consolidate learning, to reflect on and make sense of experience?

Meaning and purpose

Feeling mentally and/or physically stretched in some way that makes our life worthwhile.

Do you stretch yourself learning new things? Do you care for or serve others? Do you feel part of something larger, eg, practising a faith, working for a cause, pursuing a goal or quest?

Phone +64 27 233 9048
Check out details for enquiries, coaching sessions and bookings.